My Big Break

Yesterday, I got the call. Filming is underway in Baltimore for a television series starring Kevin Spacey, and they wanted yours truly to be a "featured extra." Yep, not just your run-of-the-mill-standing-in-the-background-never-gonna-see-you-on-film kind of extra, but a handing-Mr.-Spacey-his-coffee-in-slow-motion kind of extra. Okay, maybe it wouldn't be in slow motion until I played it back that way on the dvr, but you never know. They needed me today and tomorrow, and given that my boss is such an accommodating gent, I'd certainly be able to go.

"Just one little thing," I said to the casting agent. "I should probably tell you that I'm 7 months pregnant with twins, and therefore I look to be about 9 months pregnant."

"Hahahahahaha," she cackles. "That won't work. Personally, I detest pregnant women. Mr. Spacey sends his regards."

Anyway, I don't get it. They apparently wanted me to look like this:

as opposed to this:


What's the big deal?

(Note to Husband: Pregnancy pictures should never be taken in the early morning, without at least an hour to prepare, and certainly not from the back. Ever.)