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| Me and Conor |
It really is. My life right now consists of an endless cycle of breastfeeding, burping, and comforting newborns (The Husband has taken over most diaper duty). Unlike my last one, this c-section continues to cause me a great deal of pain. My boobs hurt so much that when the babies latch on, I sometimes want to vomit. My back aches from the bad posture and lack of abdominal strength I've adopted in the last several months. And to top it off, because I'm still on bedrest for high blood pressure that can turn hospitalization worthy in the two weeks following delivery, I see very little of life outside of my bedroom.
But sleep is what I miss the most. I am lucky if I sleep two hours in one night, and those hours are not in a row. I'm embarrassed to admit that on more than one occasion, I've chosen the prospect of two minutes of sleep over brushing my teeth. And showering just might be a thing of the past.
Two nurses at the hospital who had twins gave me this advice: Take it one day at a time. I'm really trying to live by that, because the thought of continuing like this for the next day -- let alone three months or more -- makes me want to scream.
The only solace I have is that I know they'll grow out of this stage, and because of the exhaustion, I'll forget most of how I'm feeling right now. I've even forgotten most of the night and day after the babies' births, but I do recall being so tired in my hospital room that I would nod off even if someone was talking directly to me. I'm convinced that this amnesia is what allows people to have more than one child. If not for that, why would anyone put themselves through this more than once?
Maybe it's because they smell good. And they could fit into tiny doll clothes. And some of them have crazy spiky hair.
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| Conor (left) and Samantha (right) |
First, congratulations!!
ReplyDeleteSecond, DO NOT take it one day at a time. That is too long of a time to consider with newborn twins. Take it one three hour stretch at a time. It will slowly get easier but in the beginning, even 24 hours seems like an eternity.
Jon and I used to bicker over whether to set the alarm for 45 minutes or 47 minutes. That's the insanity of newborn twins for you right there.
Remember my post about "twins" being a euphemism for "two $@!$!&!! babies at the same time? Keep that in mind. It is hard!! It is the hardest thing I have ever done! Yes it will get easier, but that I hardly any consolation right now while you are sore, exhausted, pulled in a thousand directions, stuck in your bedroom, lonely, exhausted, hormonal, exhausted and stinky (believe me, I remember!) You have taken a step in the right direction just by acknowledging the suckiness factor and by enlisting the help of your awesome husband to take on some of the load! See? You're amazing! Keep telling yourself that, and also allow someone -- anyone -- to take S and C during their rare awake but not hungry periods, so that you can sleep while they're awake AS WELL as when they're asleep. Do NOT worry about needing to bond or whatever Mommy-Guilt insanity that crops up. Just take care of YOU!! And call for reinforcements! I'm just a phone call away if you need to vent. Seriously. I have been there, done that, wanted to jump off the roof if my house. And I lived to tell about it! Hang in there! The babies are beautiful!!!! Xoxox!
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